As paranoia sets in...

Tired.

Can't even begin to describe the kind of fatigue I'm feeling currently.

Its the kind that swallows you whole, consumes every bit of energy that you still have. Both mental and physical. Just brutal.

At times I wish I could just drop everything and escape it all. But I know that's not possible. I drag myself everyday to work, feeling my will being tortured with every single step, and feeling battered and brutally beaten at the end of everyday.

I have never imagined that the path I've chosen was damned from the very beginning. During these moments I wish I had the ability to foresee the future and remain where I was. It was an opportunity of a lifetime, that now I feel like it's a mistake of a lifetime. With all the ups and downs that you would normally find between the pages of a bestselling paperback, I found out that its my current reality. Its proven now that walking the path is most definitely not the same as knowing the path.

I am tested at every corner that I don't know how long I could last further. When is the last straw before I crack. I dread for it till it comes. How I wish that it wont ever , but every single day proves to be the opposite.

What's it like being a caged bird?